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Mar. 4th, 2012 09:51 pmUsually, I look at my journal, and when I think about what to type, all that comes up is, "Where do I begin?"
A. I'm still alive.
B. My computer is still on the verge of breaking apart and still needs fixing. So I'm behind on MLP: FiM and HS, no need to tell me.
C. I have a trillion things to rant about (ex. the censorship of Derpy Hooves no thanks to SJWs, anime is a medium and not a genre and you're not magically "superior" because you hate anime, the ZOMG-Beauty-and-the-Beast-promotes-Stockholm-Syndrome argument is trite and old and I'm sick of hearing it (and no, it doesn't make you ~edgy~ to realize dark truths about Disney either), blah blah I'm fed up with idiots in general) and too exhausted to go through them all.
D. I still have Writer's Block and I beat myself constantly over it.
E. Might as well get into one of my rants from C. I fucking hate it whenever I tell people I have Writer's Block and I haven't been able to write anything for months, they tell me to "take a break for a while." Did you even hear what I fucking told you? "Not being able to write" means not being able to fucking write. At all. By telling me to take a break, you're implying that I've been working and typing, which I've been trying to tell you is absolutely not true. You're making it sound like I've been straining my brain by staring at a blank page when in reality I haven't opened Microsoft Word or a notebook in months because I feel like absolute shit. You wouldn't tell a person sitting at the beach doing nothing to "take a break" would you? That would be like telling an unemployed person who wished they had a job to "quit working so hard." It's a fucking kick in the teeth, and don't make me feel like doing the same to you if I talk about how I'm still stuck in my rut.
F. I really hope I move into Dad's office soon. I can only take one more day of listening to Dad yell at someone on the phone or Mom bitch and verbally abuse and drill Dad while he's screaming at her to shut up and yeah my brain just shut down. I feel under so much pressure and my thoughts get clouded and I feel so fucking depressed.
G. Saw Secret World of Arrietty, which is good, but that's to be expected of Studio Ghibli. ( One little complaint about the ending though. )
H. Played and finished SA1. Was going to type in detail about my replay, but right now I don't give a fuck.
I. I've been upset for months (one of the reasons being the Block) and the little things make me madder/sadder than usual. I'm at the end of my rope and I'm already aware there's a trillion things wrong with me, okay?
This post has been crossposted with Dreamwidth at http://shamanicshaymin.dreamwidth.org/16010.html. Pick your poison. Mwoiiiiiiiing~!
A. I'm still alive.
B. My computer is still on the verge of breaking apart and still needs fixing. So I'm behind on MLP: FiM and HS, no need to tell me.
C. I have a trillion things to rant about (ex. the censorship of Derpy Hooves no thanks to SJWs, anime is a medium and not a genre and you're not magically "superior" because you hate anime, the ZOMG-Beauty-and-the-Beast-promotes-Stockholm-Syndrome argument is trite and old and I'm sick of hearing it (and no, it doesn't make you ~edgy~ to realize dark truths about Disney either), blah blah I'm fed up with idiots in general) and too exhausted to go through them all.
D. I still have Writer's Block and I beat myself constantly over it.
E. Might as well get into one of my rants from C. I fucking hate it whenever I tell people I have Writer's Block and I haven't been able to write anything for months, they tell me to "take a break for a while." Did you even hear what I fucking told you? "Not being able to write" means not being able to fucking write. At all. By telling me to take a break, you're implying that I've been working and typing, which I've been trying to tell you is absolutely not true. You're making it sound like I've been straining my brain by staring at a blank page when in reality I haven't opened Microsoft Word or a notebook in months because I feel like absolute shit. You wouldn't tell a person sitting at the beach doing nothing to "take a break" would you? That would be like telling an unemployed person who wished they had a job to "quit working so hard." It's a fucking kick in the teeth, and don't make me feel like doing the same to you if I talk about how I'm still stuck in my rut.
F. I really hope I move into Dad's office soon. I can only take one more day of listening to Dad yell at someone on the phone or Mom bitch and verbally abuse and drill Dad while he's screaming at her to shut up and yeah my brain just shut down. I feel under so much pressure and my thoughts get clouded and I feel so fucking depressed.
G. Saw Secret World of Arrietty, which is good, but that's to be expected of Studio Ghibli. ( One little complaint about the ending though. )
H. Played and finished SA1. Was going to type in detail about my replay, but right now I don't give a fuck.
I. I've been upset for months (one of the reasons being the Block) and the little things make me madder/sadder than usual. I'm at the end of my rope and I'm already aware there's a trillion things wrong with me, okay?
This post has been crossposted with Dreamwidth at http://shamanicshaymin.dreamwidth.org/16010.html. Pick your poison. Mwoiiiiiiiing~!
